Bye Bye Timeshare..

Poor Hubby....first I put his bachelor couch on the curb (1997: it didn't match the decor). Next I sent his poor kitty off to the dumb friends league (1999: hey, the cat nipped at me and soiled my new-match-the-decor couch). Oh, and somewhere in there, I also found a way to get rid of his Italian bedroom furniture (hello: European sizes meant we could not find a replacement mattress for it) and his kitchen table (glass top+children= HELLO?)

And today? I managed to give away his timeshare..

Miles, circa 2002, Lawrence Welk Resort, Escondido, CA

And folks wonder why I encourage the motorcycle habit.

Guilty Conscience, I suspect

Hilton Grand Vacation Club, Orlando FL, 2007

But seriously, it is a day to celebrate. We were able to donate the timeshare to charity. A fee was involved (which sort of set of my radar for scams) but that fee was about 1/2 of what we pay each year in maintenance dues/RCI dues/Exchange fees.

Miles at the spa in Pagosa Springs Wyndham Resorts

Without a doubt, we have some wonderful memories of vacations spent "at the time share".

But the idea that now we plan our vacations based on where we want to go, when we want to go, not where there is an RCI opening? See...it needed to go, right?

Track Off Tales

Thing Two is off track. Both myself and hubby have been working (though Hubby was able to arrange a few work-from-home days). I offered this kid a variety of opportunities to do stuff with some of the local "off track" facilities. He wrinkled up his nose, convinced he wanted to be home alone. I figured he'd soon discover how boring this was and be a willing attendee. You know, natural consequences.

My plan? Has failed miserably. This kid not only enjoys being home, he's showing me in little ways just how responsible he can be when faced with a challenging situation.

• First call came in earlier in the week, when he calmly announced "This is not a big emergency Mom, but um, I can't seem to get my finger unstuck". "Unstuck from WHAT I ask" (and yes, my voice cracked a little, just ask my co-worker who was trying hard not to giggle). "Well, you know that metal loop thing at the end of the saucepan". "yes?"..."Well, I can't get my finger out...oh wait...never mind...it's out...Bye!"
• Next time, I pick up the phone and the little voice on the other end tells me 'the good new is, it didn't start a fire". Again, my voice cracks as I attempt to remain calm with my questioning. Turns out, Thing Two tried to fix some lunch (ramen noodles) and got distracted (big surprise, NOT). He soon discovered that water is a critical addition to the successful preparation of Top Ramen.
• The final heart-stopping event was Thursday. I walked in the house soon after the Ramen incident, to discover this brave Thing standing by the back screen door, wimpy fly swatter in hand. As he tries to take on the dozen or so wasps that had flown into the kitchen when he put the scorched pan on the back porch. Good for him (and for my overall health) that the wasps this time of year are very weak (most have died off as the weather is getting cold at night) and thus were already near death as this boy tried to single-handedly fight them all off.

I have to admit...he's done really well and seems very proud of himself for having survived this experience. As for me, well...let's just say I really wish he'd have been bored.

If it looks like a duck

Today, "Skippy" comes in (yes, Skippy of the Fire Alarm fiasco, not his real name, but trust me, close enough). With his always-worried TA (she's the type that would hear hoof beats and go looking for zebras. You know what I'm talking about). "He's just SOOO tired" she tells me. "And he's shaking....see????" (all I noticed was a young man, granted a bit tired looking, but looking just like he has all the other times I've seen him. many fries short of a full happy meal)

She then whispers "do you think he took something, you know, drinking or maybe even d.r.u.g.s.?" (yes, I kid you not, she spelled it out...'cuz Skippy can't spell. And never mind the fact that since the Alarm Fiasco, he's under direct adult supervision all school day).

I ask: "Skippy, why are you so sleepy today?"
"Well, Ms. Chang, it's because I didn't go to bed last night. See, I just can't turn off Cartoon Network. ESPECIALLY when Scooby Do is on. "

I'm sorry but all we have here is a sleepy child....whose parents might want to consider setting a timer on the t.v. (trust me, they make such things...just ask the Things in our house).

And as for the "what not to say at a 504 meeting"....if you are giving your child pain pills from YOUR stash, it's probably not a good idea to admit that to a room full of mandatory reporters...just sayin'...

If you name your child Skippy*

Do not be surprised, when he's 17, you receive a phone call from the school informing you that he has just pulled the fire alarm.

which resulted in the evacuation of some 2400 students and staff, right in the middle of first lunch period. Yeah, those poor kids who had life guard training were not a happy bunch to be standing outside in not much more than their suits and flip flops.

And yes, for the record, Skippy is cognitively impaired and had only recently earned the privilege to go to lunch without direct supervision. Um, not any more

(*and yes, I have changed Skippy's name...in case for some remote reason, his parents found out I was blogging about him. Suffice to say, his given name is equally amusing and would result in a "somehow I'm not as surprised as I should be" giggle. Just ask Colleen-O or Mrs. Zimmer).

Tune in later...when I share the "what not to say at a 504 meeting"......