Sunday, August 17, 2014


Yesterday seemed to be all about goodbyes.

There are the goodbyes we know must happen.  Such was the case for Mrs. D, a neighbor friend who has dedicated her summer to saying goodbye to her childhood home and helping her mom, the wonderful Mrs. G, move on to a living arrangement that can better meet her memory needs.    They close on Monday, so yesterday was the last trip to the family home.
Caitlin and her grandma, circa 2009
There are the goodbyes we know are coming but we just don't know when.   .
  Such was the case for my dear friend, Mrs. Z.     Her sister passed away yesterday morning.   Oh sure, we knew it was coming as her sister has struggled with some demons for most of her life.   But you are never fully prepared for when the end arrives.   You may know it's coming, but when it happens, well, there goes that hope.   That little glimmer of hope that maybe one day your loved one realizes that sobriety was a healthier and better decision.     Mrs. Z, your sister is no longer hurting, and know that your sister wives are here for you...ready to offer a hug, a good laugh, or even a trip to Village Inn, diets be damned!

And finally there is the unthinkable goodbye.   When you lose a child.   Yesterday, a family I have met through an online community said their final goodbyes to their 6 year old daughter.    Katie  just had more illness than modern medicine and prayer could fix.   How do you move forward from this devastating loss?   I do not know, but her family has amazed me through the years with their gracious ways and I have no doubt they will indeed move forward.   But for now, prayers for the Murphy family is all I can offer.

But not all goodbyes are about tears of sadness.   Yesterday was our neighborhood's annual party-in-the-park.   Sort of a good-bye to summer, complete with live band, catered BBQ, bounce houses galore, and all your friends and neighbors out enjoying one last summer evening before we say goodbye to the lazy days of summer.   School starts here while the calendar tells  us we've still got a month or so left of summer, in our hearts, we know that Summer 2014 is pretty much all wrapped up.

And while it seemed a little bit wrong and selfish to be having a good time with friends while others were having one helluva bad day, I also know that is what we need to do....creating those memorable moments, so that when it is time to say a goodbye of a sadder note, we can draw comfort from those many happy less painful times.

For my 3 friends that I dedicate this post to, my family and I send you our heartfelt sympathies...hoping you draw comfort from the loving support of those of us who love you dearly!


Pubshark said...

Well said

tz said...

ah Martha I just love you
Mrs. Z

Anonymous said...

I don't know what we did 'right' but I'm proud to be your daddy!

Colleen Dobson said...

Oh Martha. Well said, and thank you for putting it into words. I'm still pissed off about goodbye. Mom and I were talking about the fact that this is the ripping off the band-aid part. I'm anxious for the wave of relief I think will come after, and finding that good in goodbye.

Colleen Dobson said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Katrina D. said...

Martha, you certainly have a way with words. Well said. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Yes, Miss Martha, you certainly have a way with words. Well said. And so thoughtful! Hugs and kisses, Shell