Friday, September 17, 2010

Power of the Peppermint

Today I had a meeting to attend. My new (and fabulous) health tech was holding down the fort. One of our frequent fliers came in reporting a tummy ache. She tossed him a peppermint and sent him back to class (see, I told you she was good).

Not long after this...we hear a radio call looking for Peppermint Boy. Seems he was AWOL.
We reported that no, we were not harboring this fugitive and the security team went searching for him.

Next thing I know, Peppermint Boy is back in our clinic. Only this time he is escorted by the Dean. Sure 'nuf, Peppermint Boy is higher than a kite. Seems he had a different idea on what would settle his upset tummy.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Open Letters

Dear Cowards:
No, we haven't forgotten. 9 years later, and the horror of that day lives on in our memories. Not only will we never forget, I will never forgive.
Proud Patriot

Dear Helicopter Mom
I'm so sorry that "someone" forgot to take the medicine out of your daughter's back pack. I hope by "someone" you really mean your daughter. Because, I've got 2399 other little darlings to worry about. I don't inspect the backpacks. That's the Dean's job. And trust me, he ain't looking for what your daughter is packing!
Weary School Nurse

Good Afternoon Mrs. Germaphobe
I'm so sorry to hear that Princess has strep. You say she caught it on the bus? Oh my bad, here I thought it was from the boy I saw her kissing last week. Sure, I can let the bus driver know she needs to disinfect her ride. But let's just be clear, if Princess ends up preggers, you probably might want to re-think my "germ theory".
Nurse Blunt

Sunday, September 05, 2010

Brought to you by the letter F

Today's entry is sponsored by the letter F...

Family: here we are, helping Janet and Oscar celebrate their wedding.

And Foolishness...

Foolishness is not limited to my Teen Thing.
Friday...where does one begin? With the young lady who came into the clinic, throwing up again. This marked the 3rd time in a week that she presented with such symptoms. I asked that touchy question "do you think you could be pregnant?" NO WAY, she replied, I can prove it. She apparently had just had a battery of blood tests done that ruled our pregnancy but confirmed chlamydia. "Do you think my medicine for my chlamydia is making me sick?
Fire Drills: should be a fun time, right?
Breaks up the routine of the day. Get outside and enjoy some fresh air on a cool morning?
Nope...soon after they made the all clear sign, security escorted the wounded to me.
Seems two boys decided that being outside,surrounded by peers and every administrator on campus, was a great time to have a fist fight. The kid with the split lip and the emerging black eye? Got hit by the kid with just one arm.
(seriously? you can't make this stuff up).
Ah, lunch is usually pretty slow in the nurse's office.
Not so today. Apparently, Wendy's was serving up something "special". Or so one of our regulars wanted us to believe. She was escorted to my clinic by the Deans. She stunk...yeah...THAT type of smell. She looked at me all dazed and confused
"Honest Miss, We went to Wendy's and someone else in the car smoked the pot"
Now granted, I've never smoked, pot or cigs...but it seems to me that of all the drugs out there,
pot is the one substance best enjoyed with others. You mean to tell me she smoked and didn't share? I find that impossible to believe.
The truth?
Was in her eyes, her smell and the fact that when asked to close her eyes and touch her nose
She quite a bit At this point, I lost it, and laughed..
This is the same young lady who last Spring also made a visit to my office. That time she admitted to having smoked some stuff. But, in her defense, well, it was her Mama's medicinal marijuana and Mama was in the hospital and thus getting the good stuff. She didn't want it to go to waste. Again, being a novice on this whole topic of pot, I didn't think weed "went bad".
These kids?
Do they really think we are that stupid?
Apparently so.
So now you can understand why this weekend,
I'm just resting, relaxing and re-grouping...
For the fun that awaits me when I return to work on Tuesday!